“May I speak to Mister Booth, please?”
“Speaking,” I answered, while thinking ‘Oh-ho, official-sounding voice, someone wanting money.’ I was right.
“Good morning, Mister Booth,” said the anonymous voice. From the bank.
“Good morning,” I stammered.
“Will you be putting any funds into your account in the near future?” In a word: NOW!
“Uh…” My ‘uh’ seemed to go on forever. “Yes,” I finally blurted out. It was true, too. I had been working months for one person who owed me enough to cover the overdraft. And he was supposed to pay me this week. Thank God.
“When?” Are bank people allowed to be that nosy? Can they interrogate you like that? Aren’t they supposed to take your word as gospel? Isn’t the customer always right? And the answers are: yes, yes, no, no!
“Uh, by the end of the week.”
“Very well. We’ll be keeping an eye on your account.”
“Thank you.” Thank you?!
As soon as he hung up, I grabbed the phone and dialled the character who owed me enough money to cover the overdraft;
“I can’t pay you, Robert, I don’t have the money.” Just like that. No apology. Nothing. I freaked, told him to go to hell. Unbeknownst to me, my children overheard and immediately came running to give me a kiss and a hug. When your children feel sorry for you...
I still had two or three other calls to make – people who owed me money for work I had done. It wouldn’t cover the overdraft, but it would keep the bank off my back for a while. I made the calls. The answers all had the same central theme.
“Uh, Robert… I can pay you half at the end of next week, the rest at the end of next month…”
“I’m a little short at the moment, Robert, but I have another job for you…”
“If all you can think about is the money, Robert, then perhaps you aren’t the sort of person I want working with me…”
I finally put down the phone. I felt awful, so miserable. I’M OVERDRAWN! DOWN ON MY LUCK! BROKE! ON THE VERGE OF BEING HOMELESS! Someone try asking my landlady if I can go without paying the rent for a few months, or ask the power company to hold my bills, or see if the supermarket will give me credit so that I may feed my children. We all know what the answer would be. A big fat NO!
I don’t know why, but I have this habit of attracting losers, people who don’t pay. No, I’m not running a charity, though sometimes I suspect I am. My (real) friends often ask if any donations to me would be tax deductible? They have a point.
The phone rang. Oh-ho. No, it wasn’t the bank again. It was Stella. “Amore, I can’t come to the James Taylor concert this evening. I have to work late.” I was feeling too down to complain.
I had completely forgotten about James Taylor; not that I was in the mood to go, but the tickets had cost good money, which was at a premium, not to be wasted. I made a few calls to friends, but no one could come with me.
So I went alone. On my scooter. And it poured all the way.
I took my seat just as the lights dimmed and James Taylor walked onto the stage to thunderous applause…
And then he started to sing ‘When you're down and troubled, and you need a helping hand, and nothing, oh nothing is going right... You’ve Got A Friend!’ and the bank was pushed to the back of my mind, and I remembered that life is indeed beautiful, even with my hair dripping rainwater.
Thank you, James.
“Very well. We’ll be keeping an eye on your account.”
“Thank you.” Thank you?!
As soon as he hung up, I grabbed the phone and dialled the character who owed me enough money to cover the overdraft;
“I can’t pay you, Robert, I don’t have the money.” Just like that. No apology. Nothing. I freaked, told him to go to hell. Unbeknownst to me, my children overheard and immediately came running to give me a kiss and a hug. When your children feel sorry for you...
I still had two or three other calls to make – people who owed me money for work I had done. It wouldn’t cover the overdraft, but it would keep the bank off my back for a while. I made the calls. The answers all had the same central theme.
“Uh, Robert… I can pay you half at the end of next week, the rest at the end of next month…”
“I’m a little short at the moment, Robert, but I have another job for you…”
“If all you can think about is the money, Robert, then perhaps you aren’t the sort of person I want working with me…”
I finally put down the phone. I felt awful, so miserable. I’M OVERDRAWN! DOWN ON MY LUCK! BROKE! ON THE VERGE OF BEING HOMELESS! Someone try asking my landlady if I can go without paying the rent for a few months, or ask the power company to hold my bills, or see if the supermarket will give me credit so that I may feed my children. We all know what the answer would be. A big fat NO!
I don’t know why, but I have this habit of attracting losers, people who don’t pay. No, I’m not running a charity, though sometimes I suspect I am. My (real) friends often ask if any donations to me would be tax deductible? They have a point.
The phone rang. Oh-ho. No, it wasn’t the bank again. It was Stella. “Amore, I can’t come to the James Taylor concert this evening. I have to work late.” I was feeling too down to complain.
I had completely forgotten about James Taylor; not that I was in the mood to go, but the tickets had cost good money, which was at a premium, not to be wasted. I made a few calls to friends, but no one could come with me.
So I went alone. On my scooter. And it poured all the way.
I took my seat just as the lights dimmed and James Taylor walked onto the stage to thunderous applause…
And then he started to sing ‘When you're down and troubled, and you need a helping hand, and nothing, oh nothing is going right... You’ve Got A Friend!’ and the bank was pushed to the back of my mind, and I remembered that life is indeed beautiful, even with my hair dripping rainwater.
Thank you, James.
✌ ✌ ✌ ✌ ✌
1 comment:
Very enjoyable! I like the funny side of the serious bank conversation and how the bank man feels like this watchful enemy. And with the concert it feels like I am there. Also the difference between the bank discussion and James Taylor lyrics! One of my favourite ones' I think. Its like you have pointed out a bigger perspective on life whene ending with the music concert.
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